I assume she was mad at me, for insisting that if she wants me to take the sofa that it would have to be done Sunday morning. But it could have been for any number of things.

Sad as it is not such a bad place to be.

So she rings today, to say she is thinking of going out with a friend after college to some new exhibition in town.

Not sure what this has to do with me. Well I know what it has to do with me, nothing.

I do not need to know and I have no real interest.

The only relevant point was, and all that she needed to ask was if daughter could have tea at mine. That is of course a yes. It will always be a yes if I am at home. Even when I am not she is welcome to go there, as Big Brother will no doubt be in.

It was like the other day, when she rang to tell me she had just started her period. I certainly had no need to know this little gem of information.

As I have mentioned before, she seems to also have the belief that I should share all sorts of information with her. Most of which I do not think she has any real need to know. So I keep it to myself.

If she asks a direct question I will give her a direct answer. As lying is just a waste of time and too dam stressful for me.

Just that I do not volunteer information I feel has nothing to do with her.

I hope daughter does come round after school. She may be going to the gym, which is great as the gym is near the house. She normally goes to the gym on Tuesday, but she looked shattered on Tuesday, Half term catching up on her, also I think she wanted to get back to her Mum’s to start making her pancakes. Sadly for her this was a solo activity, as Mum was out. Much more fun to do these things together.

It was just me and youngest, eldest did not join us and daughter declined the invite. She did hers by herself at her Mum’s as Mum was at college.

Anyway youngest and I had fun cooking and tossing our pancakes. At time it was a bit of a race to rescue it from the floor before the dogs got there.

I was thinking in other countries they hold massive fiestas with half naked women parading and dancing in the street. And plenty more in the crowd willing to get in the same state if you think that what you see on YouTube is representative.

So eating pancakes seems to be a somewhat tame way to mark the beginning of lent.

Would I have rather been partying with semi undressed ladies. Or making pancakes at home with youngest?

I’ll take the latter.

What a sad old tosser I am!

going on about how much pressure she is under, and how hard she is finding everything. And how she is sorry she keeps calling me, but she does not have anyone else she can talk to or turn to.

I bit my tongue and just listened. I did not mention that it was odd when she in fact has a fiancée. She says she is meant to e doing a maths exam this morning, she said she told the teacher she was not up to it, but he was saying for her to take it anyway, as it will be good practice.

Then she was saying she has only done 3 out of 6 artists she was meant to cover for her homework. And so it went on. one sorrow after another. How difficult it was to move, how stressful it was.

She then rang me back and thanked me for listening.

So that was the first moving story, and for the next

Yesterday I finally gave in and said I would take the sofa, as payment of her outstanding debt.

She was then pushing for me to take it from her as soon as possible.

I said I would try and find a man with a van. Then she says well if I am getting someone to move the sofa from hers to mine, I could then get them to move the stuff from my garage to hers, again she would like this done as soon as possible.

I promised to look in to it for her.

And this is the ensuing text exchange.

Thank you it is appreciated. Please tell me what day the man with the van can collect the sofa and would you be able to allow him to bring my furniture from the garage it would make it a little easier for me.

I will ring him

Sunday morning ok for moving stuff.
I will have to help so he’ll have to be out of the way.
9 am Ok?

Not at the weekend sorry I am not being awkward.

Only chance I have.

Take it or leave it.

It is no good sorry

Ok I tried.
You sort out picking up the stuff from the garage.
And we will cancel the deal on the sofa. I can not do it in the week.

Now you are not letting me off the money?

The money was for the sofa. If I can not get the sofa. Then there is not really a deal.

Take it please stop bullying me

I’m not. You ask me to organise the move as soon as possible. You ask me to take a sofa I do not really need instead of you paying back what you owe and you ask me to move the stuff back to your flat.

I work all week. So can only sort it for the weekend So I have organised this as quickly as possible to help you. But if you can not be bothered to work with me on this then I give up. No bullying just business

Fuck you have made me walk out of an exam leave me alone I have had it with you.

You should not have answered if you were in the exam. It would have kept.
Which is why I text rather than rang

Sunday 9 for the men to pick up you win again. Thank you for ruining my exam.

I will have to come in and help. Unless you have someone to help with the lifting.

Not a question of winning.
You really should not have been looking at your phone through the exam

You said you had someone to help it only takes two men.

Yes me and him.
Just saying it means I have to come in and help him.
Just making sure this is ok

Yes it is ok now enough bullying you have to stop thank you.

No bullying.
Please do not twist everything.

Ok all my fault please I have a lot to do today.

Was I being a bully?

I have just been told that I am responsible for having humiliated her in her maths exam and once more if bullying and blackmailing her.

Then she is on about her college fees. Which I tried to pay recently but as she was not enrolled they would not take the payment. And it was left with her saying for me to wait until she sorted out her enrolment. And she would tell me when that was done so I could pay her fees.

And now she is all up a hight accusing me of deliberately not paying

Last night he tried to convince me and his big brother, that today was in fact a bank holiday in the UK. But we did not fall for that one.

So this morning, it was he was sick, and then he turned on the charm offensive, saying how I am the best Dad in the world, and he would just love to stay home and cuddle me all day.

I said well that would be just great, but I have to go to work and you have to go to school.

So he said he would come with me and sit in my office.

But in the end he went to school, fairly happily.

It is nice being at home for this small domestic stuff. I hope to be able to swing it that I am here most of the week. And onsite locally witnessing some verification testing.

So in his chart for best Dad, I come out top dog. Which to me is just fine. Admittedly the competition is limited. But still

Then the Ex is on the phone.

Could she have some more money as she has been buying stuff for youngest for his new room.

I asked why she was doing it no if she did not have the money. So she says, that she wants his room to be as nice as possible for him when they move, as he never liked his room in her current flat.

The she says the sofa, would I buy it off her for £400. She says it cost a lot more than that new.

I said I know, I paid for it.

I said I do not really need the sofa and I do not have the money. as for the money for the youngest stuff, I will have a look at my bank balance this evening when I get home and consider it.

She says she is sorry, she does not know who else to turn to for money. So it seems I win yet another 1 horse race. Though the prize in this one is not so great.

She rings back again and say, how about £300 for the sofa, crying saying she is desperate as she has no money.

And as for the money for youngest am I going to help her or not, or am I just playing with her.

I explain once more that I can not tell her until I have looked at my banking.

She demands to know where my money has gone.

So I say, not that is really anything to do with her, but well I am loosing out on the exchange rate. The Euro is slipping compared to the pound, then I have brought all the birthday presents for youngest and then I have her college fees to pay.

So not much money to spare.

So daughter wanted to come round for some help with her maths homework and the Ex wanted to start picking up some of the stuff she has been storing here to put back in her apartment before she moves out.

So I invited them round and got a cake, and he opened his present this morning. He can have some friends around next week for a party.

I noticed that the engagement ring is now back on.

Odd when it was off she said that he even lied about how much it cost, saying it was £300 and she said she knew it was from Argos and only a £150. Also apparently there was some dispute about the stone so much so that he had sent her a device that is meant to be able to tell if the diamond is real or not.

I am assuming it is the same ring.

Anyway chose not to say anything about it.

Eldest says he noticed she was wearing it the other week when it ended up in a brawl with BF in the drive. I had not noticed it then.

Think this ring has been on and off more times than a hookers knickers.

She started pulling stuff out of the garage, she was not a happy bunny, as when he had put it in there he had just dumped it in and some of the stuff is in a very bad way, in fact one table had its leg broken off but she says she has managed to stick it on again.

I dropped some stuff off when I took daughter back, just left it on the path by her front door.

Anyway yesterday, youngest and I went swimming and then to see Star wars episode I in 3D at the cinema.

It was OK the 3D’ness was not mind blowing as with modern films. but it must be difficult to recreate it in a film that was originally filmed in 2D.

Then we had Sushi and headed home

Got back and youngest started moaning about wanting to open his presents, at this stage I had not even wrapped them, so much so I sent him to his room. He actually went to the bathroom and locked himself in there and sulked.

Looking from the office window in Luanda, I could see these  tower blocks.

Two currently under construction, and one apparently that has been there for more than 10 years, though it is hard to tell if it was really ever finished.

The ones under construction could be a view of the same activity in any major western city. Where as the other?

Which would you rather be in?

I will resume my normal service of reporting on the Ex’s latest demands and escapades.

Of course she rang me a number of times. First question was if it was costing her more to ring me on my mobile when I was in Angola, after I reassured her that no, but it was costing me, she seemed OK.

She was in tears, as she had had some sort of run in with her downstairs neighbour as to who takes the bins in after collection. She claims she always does it. He apparently says well he only has one bag of rubbish, so does not seem to think he should have to do it.

Then it was on to college work and they have to study 6 new artists, and one of her friends had text to say she had just spent £80 on books to cover the topics. I said well that is what libraries are for.

Then she was saying that her latest piece of art was crap, like a 5 year old, and that she was useless. Useless at art and not capable of even getting a basic job.

Seems like someone has been working his magic once more.

I told her, it is odd how once more you are running yourself down, now he is back on the scene.

She denied there was any connect, so I left it at that.

Then on to money. She is saying she can not cope and is sinking further in to debt all of the time.

She said she just can not cope, So I should just take the kids off her now.

She goes she does not want to take money from the BF as she does not want him to have that hold on her. Odd choice of words I feel.

Then she goes could she have back the £100 I deducted at the beginning of the month, to payback, a greatly reduced sum of money. And could I stop deducting it from the next four months, as agreed before.

I asked if she was asking me to defer repayment or if she was expecting me to let her off, once more.

She was very quiet, so I eventually said, from the silence I assume that you are expecting to be let off?

Yes she replies.

I said when we were together, and we had to borrow of your Granddad, the first we did when I got paid was to pay him back. The same with your Dad. It was always the most important thing for you. To pay back what we owed.

So I said, why is it that you expect me to let you off every time, you get some extra money, why do I not get treated with the same respect?

Eventually she said I was right, and she did not want the £100 and she would pay back the rest as agreed.

It is always the same, when she is back with him. Self confidence is destroyed and every possible angle to get more money.

I am acting as her Guarantor on the flat, and that for me is the limit.

I got myself near the from of the queue to ensure a window seat. I missed out on this on the way down.

I still love to look out of the window, especially when flying over new places.

It is a very arid looking country, and in some places the soil is incredibly red.

It was still run in an orderly and efficient manner, which is such a contrast to Nigeria.

What was most refreshing was, not once was I asked the question “What do you have for your friend” or “what do you have for me” This was great. This is something I was asked 10 or 12 times while trying to negotiate through the various checks at Port Harcourt Airport, this was by officials at passport control, though to some random person you had to make a currency declaration to , to the multiple people who said they had to search your bags.

The Angolans were very friendly and helpful.

It was a world apart from the hustle and bustle of the big city. With open roads which were traffic free.

It seems that there is a lot of money being invested in the area, the roads were decent, they are building a new rail link and a new international airport. There seems to be a reasonable amount of industry.

The hotel we  stayed in was lovely. A remnant of the country’s colonial past. The Portuguese in this case. They did not move out until 1975. After which the country descended  in to a bloody and violent civil war. It was not until about 2002 that things settled down, and the country since then has made great headway. Aided off course by having a lot of offshore oil.

It is good to see that the money from this oil is being invested in the country and raising the standard of living for all.

The climate was great. About 20 to 25°C pleasant cooling breeze from the sea and low humidity.